DON’T LOOK UNDER THE BED Results – 2/11/22

You’ve never seen it, but you know it’s there. The moment the lights go out, it ripples across your skin with pinpricks of apprehension. It slides up your spine and into your belly, coiling into a serpentine knot of fear that sits cold and heavy. The sheer weight of it, the lethal size and ungodly horror fill you until your flesh threatens to split with the force of every survival instinct you still possess in the vestigial remnants of your primal lizard brain.

You’ve never seen it, but you know it’s there – and while your body screams at you to move, to look, to fight, the only thing you’re certain of is that you’ll be safe so long as you Don’t Look Under The Bed.

The stars and fans of MPW did not heed that advice…so with spoiler warnings ahead for the event in question?

Let’s find out what we saw when we pulled the bedskirts aside.



With Bryan Carter once again at the soundboard, the show was about to begin when out of nowhere, an unexpected presence showed up: one Alejandro Mauricio Fernandez. Strutting with his usual arrogance, seething with an undercurrent of simmering rage, he made his way to the ring, seized the microphone, and took immediate issue with MPW’s new general manager.

Fernandez wasn’t on the card for that night, and he was there to demand a title shot after beating Brendan Divine at last week’s I Need A Hero.

Carter heard his grievance, and in a move that likely surprised all, he spoke plainly with Fernandez and told him the truth: he’s just not, to quote Carter, “that guy.” Conceding his performance at I Need A Hero was impressive, Carter had yet to see that Fernandez was ready to go to the next level.

Fuming, Fernandez threatened Carter with a lawsuit, berated the audience, and left, so consumed with anger the metaphorical smoke was nearly visible pouring out of his ears…and while it was entertaining to see the cocksure Fernandez get a dressing down from the self-professed Perfect Gentleman, MPW really should have expected just what this would foreshadow for the rest of the evening.


Danny Divine DEFEATS Johnnie Robbie w/Barbie Boi

Showing up to cheer Johnnie Robbie on, Barbie Boi accompanied Robbie to the ring in Pink branded black to support his friend, ally, and one of his defenders in the brutal assault by Danny Divine last week after his match with Dr. Phil Goode. Divine, himself decked out in Rams colors, was openly disdainful of the showing of solidarity as the match got underway.

From the opening moments where Robbie seized solid control with an arm drag clinic, it was nearly impossible to call this match. While control of the match moved back and forth, Robbie mercilessly assaulting Divine one moment before Divine was toying with her the next, it was a photo finish to the very end. At one point, in a sickening but also very telling display of bitterness, Divine taunted Robbie with the fact that the crowd was openly cheering her name.

“They believe in you? Yeah – they believed in me once, too!” he snapped before sending Robbie to the mat with brutal force.

It was an incredible showing from Robbie, with endless encouragement from both Barbie Boi and the fans to keep her going. Alas, it wasn’t meant to be – Robbie took Divine down with a beautiful tornado DDT, but Divine caught a lucky break and was able to secure a pinfall victory.

The story, however, did not end there. As most expected, by the end of the match there was a tense standoff between Barbie Boi and Divine – one that Carter quickly put a stop to with a declaration that this wasn’t going to happen. Instead, next week, a match has been signed: a six person tag match, featuring Barbie Boi, Robbie, and Mylo against what is being referred to as Team Champ: World Champion Danny Divine paired with the tag team champions of M.O.B., Diego Valens and Michael Hopkins.


CJ Tino DEFEATS Miggy Rose

The match began on a note that only in hindsight would turn ominous: full of hubris, CJ Tino came to the ring with a chip on his shoulder while Miggy Rose entered ready for a fight – to the adulation of the MPW audience chanting “Miggy’s House!” with greater and greater volume as it unsettled Tino. Rose merely accepted his due and set to the task at hand as the match got underway. Per the usual, things began on the mat with Rose executing every hold with nothing short of artistic flair, poetry in motion as he floated from one move to the next.

Things moved quickly to mix mat work with aerial moves. While both men were a relative match in size, Tino held an advantage in stature with far more visible power. Not one to be underestimated by any circumstances, however, Rose used leverage and speed to full advantage at every turn to take that advantage away from Tino. Running on pure inner drive and the energy of the crowd, Rose fought hard and fought well – even if he did try to execute a submission via a brief assist that came by grabbing Tino by the teeth.

In the end, however, Tino got the pinfall with his feet on the second rope, running with a coward’s cunning the second the official’s hand hit the mat for a three count. Rightfully furious, Rose was visibly frustrated by the cheap victory, right along with the rest of the audience as they all but called for the referee’s head.

Fortunately, however, MPW’s general manger is once again displaying a pleasantly surprising level of reason, and has set a return match for this week’s event, Gold Standard. We can only hope that the official for this bout will have a sharper eye this time in order to ensure a decisive outcome.

Tino/Rose 2, this week at MPW! Will Tino take another shortcut to victory? Or will Rose’s cunning and familiarity with dirty pool be able to keep the scales balanced for a clean fight? (Source: Millennium Pro Wrestling Twitter)

2 ON 1

Duke Bennett DEFEATS…Full Send?

This was the scheduled match, but as Full Send’s music hit, Bucio burst through the curtain alone, looking over his shoulder with a confusion that was surpassed only by that of the audience.

What followed, as the match got underway, can only be classified as an all out slaughter.

Bennett wasted no time in mercilessly beating Bucio down, calling for the audience to cheer a half conscious Bucio and being met with near silence. The atmosphere was downright uncomfortable as he brutalized the smaller man in front of a horrified crowd – even in the moments when Bucio managed to fight back.

And he did just that: catching a few breaks, Bucio seized upon each one like the treasure it was, fighting as hard as he could to no avail, but with a bravery and class that few could match. Every time he got up, Bennett knocked him down again – after long enough, even Bennett seemed to be unsettled by the display, stopping just short of begging Bucio to stay down.

Eventually, however, despite a noble effort, Bennett scored the pinfall victory with the vicious ragdoll slam that has become his trademark, mercifully ending the metaphorical bloodbath. Unsatisfied, however, Bennett grabbed a mic and demanded that Carter present him with something more challenging: he was sick of playing with kids and he was ready for a real fight.

Carter considered the matter, and ultimately acquiesced – officially sanctioning Duke Bennet versus Robin Shaw for next week’s Gold Standard.

Seemingly satisfied, Bennett finally left the ring – but not before going after Bucio one final time, flattening him before finally taking his leave.


Rebel Storm DEFEATS Artorius

As previously reported by the X-Press, the health and well being of the Rebel Storm were in question going into this match, and those suspicions seemed to be confirmed as he entered the ring, visibly winded and struggling to maintain his usual level of energy and enthusiasm. While there were no traces of the noxious black substance to be found on his person, Storm seemed…diminished as he made his entrance.

Was he up for this fight? Or did the Void hold some sway that would spell his downfall by the end of the night?

Entering with Hydie by his side, the familiar horned mask firmly in hand, Artorius reminded Storm that he owed the Void a debt per the terms of last week’s match: soul versus soul, and Storm had been defeated.

Having none of it, Storm did what he does best: he fought with gusto.

And, as the match progressed, while he struggled, he did do just that: fought with passion and rallied for all he was worth when the odds seemed completely against him. There were signs that he was still weakened by the Void’s infection, failing one of his trademark headbutts and losing steam a couple of times during the course of the match, but he kept himself in the match as best he could.

Even when the task seemed insurmountable. Even when he was at the mercy of Artorius and the Void, being dragged up out of a fatal pinfall just so they could play with him a little longer. Even as Hydie stood ringside with that vial of Void water, ready to finish what she started.

Rebel stayed the course…and just as all stories must eventually end, good triumphed over evil as the Rebel Storm got the pinfall victory.

However, as is also is with most stories…victory must always come at a price.

Just after scoring the win, two masked individuals swarmed the ring and beat Storm down – beat him, to be frank, within an inch of his life. Pleased with this development, Hydie found a microphone, entered the ring, and informed Storm that she no longer had any interest in claiming his soul…not when she found two others, willing to embrace the darkness.

The masked attackers revealed their faces at that moment: none other than Hellman Rosecrown and Richie Coy.

Falling at Hydie’s feet, the pair then took part in a hellish, impromptu ceremony where they willingly drank of the Void, unlike Rebel Storm and J2 who had been forced, and seemed to be in the throes of a strange, obscene sort of euphoria as its power took them over. This in and of itself was highly disturbing, but moreso were the things Auntie Hydie was heard saying after the show, reaching the ears of an X-Press source who shared her comments.

“Holding on to the souls of the pure and the bright, like J2, was far too taxing.” she was overheard crooning with some satisfaction. “It’s a waste of energy when there are those closer to darkness – the lost, the forgotten, the discarded. Those who crave power, who embrace the Void…yes, they will serve far better than the likes of the Rebel Storm…”

What could this mean for MPW’s downtrodden? For those who lack focus, embittered or scorned…when the most vulnerable among the roster, and perhaps even the fans, become the targets of the Void’s legion, is anyone safe?

We can only hope, dearest readers, that at Gold Standard, that the Rebel Storm and the Playmaker – those who have stared into the heart of darkness and come back to tell the tale – can hold the line when they take on the Void’s newest fledgling horrors. J2’s condition is vastly improved, and as for the Rebel Storm?

Good versus evil: can the Playmaker and the Thunder Wonder hold back the threat of the Void’s newest legion? (Source: Millennium Pro Wrestling Twitter)

“Yeah, I’ve been doing my research,” Storm assured the X-Press, “and I think I’ll be through this soon. All the experts say so…you can find the cure to just about anything on WebMD, ya know?”*

(*Despite the request of the Rebel Storm, for the ease of consumption quotes from the Thunder Wonder have not been transcribed in all caps.)



Brendan Divine versus Tyler Bateman – DISQUALIFICATION

The buildup to this match had expectations high, and as both challenger and champion came to the ring, the tension in the MPW Arena was so thick it was choking. What little sound there was among the fans was tense and fervent, but for the most part an electric silence hung in the air as the match got underway.

Not without some trouble, of course – as the official checked both men for weapons, Bateman was stripped of a pair of brass knuckles he gave up with a sheepishly deranged little smile before the contest got underway.

From that point on…no one could have expected the kind of contest we saw.

The first lockup. The back and forth, the sheer domination of Bateman on both a physical and a psychological playing field. Whether he was mocking the champion, pantomiming his plan of attack at ringside, or just plain taking Divine apart, Bateman was at the top of his game as he systematically dismantled Brendan Divine.

Bateman had the advantage of his unhinged and violent tendencies, his unpredictable lack of personal balance…but Divine had something he didn’t, and that was the Believers.

It was their voices that kept Divine kicking out of every pinfall attempt. It was their faith behind every punch, their belief that gave Divine new vigor when all hope seemed lost – and it did seem lost indeed when a particularly vicious DDT that Bateman delivered sent shockwaves through the crowd as the sickening thud of bone and flesh could be heard ringing through the air as Divine went down.

It was a tense, volatile, and absolutely captivating contest…but who could have triumphed is an answer we will never have, and that’s all thanks to one man: Alejandro Mauricio Fernandez.

Remember what I said earlier about foreshadowing?

Sure enough, Fernandez made us all pay by running out to interfere in the match, denying champion, challenger, and the entire MPW fanbase an answer to the question of who would prevail. With no choice but to throw the match out, Divine retained the title, but the pride of victory was denied both men by Fernandez and his temper tantrum.

For Your Consideration

Many of the matches for next week’s Gold Standard have already been announced, as well as statements made by those competing. For details, be sure to keep your finger on the pulse by checking MPW’s Twitter and Instagram, as well as those of the MPW X-Press – we will, as ever, keep you posted as our sources within the organization bring us details to ensure we deliver to you, the reader, all the news worth reporting.

Until then, folks, make plans to be there for Gold Standard, take care of yourselves, and rest easy tonight…if you can.

Just remember, whatever you do…don’t look under the bed.

One thought on “DON’T LOOK UNDER THE BED Results – 2/11/22

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